We’ve all been there. That terrible time when we have to say goodbye. I designed this resource list when I served as Director of Humane Education at the Rhode Island SPCA, and offer it here.
“There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief and unspeakable love”. ~ Washington Irving
Dodo has a lovely collection of first and last photos of beloved pets. Perhaps doing something like this would be one small thing you can do in your grieving process. We have other ideas as well.
I Remember
I stood by your bed last night. I came to have a peep.
I could see that you were crying. You found it hard to sleep.
I whined to you softly as you brushed away a tear,
“It’s me, I haven’t left you, I’m well, I’m fine, I’m here.”
I was close to you at breakfast. I watched you pour the tea.
You were thinking of the many times your hands reached down to me.
I was with you at the shops today. Your arms were getting sore.
I longed to take your parcels ~ I wish I could do more.
I was with you at my grave today. You tend it with such care.
I want to re-assure you that I’m not lying there.
I walked with you towards the house as you fumbled for your key.
I gently put my paw on you. I smiled and said “It’s me.”
You looked so very tired, and sank into a chair.
I tried so hard to let you know that I was standing there.
It’s possible for me to be so near you everyday.
To say to you with certainty, “I never went away.”
You sat there very quietly, then smiled. I think you knew ~
in the stillness of that evening, I was very close to you.
The day is over ~ I smile and watch you yawning,
and say “Good-night, God bless, I’ll see you in the morning.”
And when the time is right for you to cross the brief divide,
I’ll rush across to greet you and we’ll stand, side by side.
I have so many things to show you, there is so much for you to see.
Be patient, live your journey out ~ then come home to be with me.
— Author unknown
Links and Resources:
Pet Loss Support Hotlines
Cummings School of Veterinary Medicine at Tufts University
(508) 839-7966 M-F 6 to 9pm
The ASPCA
(877) 474-3310 Seven days a week
Websites That Offer Pet Loss Support
Tufts Veterinary Pet Loss Support Hotline
Dogtime Dog Grief Archives
Psych Central Grieving the Loss of a Pet
Association of Pet Loss and Bereavement
AHA Activities for Grieving Children
Pet Loss Grief Support Coloring Book for Kids
Pet Loss www.petloss.com
Rainbow Bridge and Pet Loss
HSUS Coping with Death of a Pet
Animal Hospices and Sanctuaries
Caring for Old, Sick or Dying Dogs
Grief Healing article on Guilt in the Wake of the Euthanasia Decision
Links to a variety of artists for memorial keepsakes
BarkPost 11 Ways To Honor Your Dog’s Memory When They Pass
Dogster article on pet loss
Matters of Love and Death article
Reading for Adults
Just One More Day (Geoffrey Bain)
Virginia Ironside.
Robson Books, London, 1994.
Going Home: Finding Peace When Pets Die (Jon Katz)
Coping with Sorrow on the Loss of Your Pet (Moira Allen)
Grieving the Death of a Pet (Betty Carmack)
When Only Love Remains: The Pain of Pet Loss (Emily Sturparyk)
When Your Pet Dies: How to Cope with Your Feelings (Jamie Quackenbush & Denise Graveline)
Blessing the Bridge (Rita Reynolds)
The Last Walk (Jessica Pierce)
Transitions (Jonathan Rudinger)
Conscious Transitions (Andrea Floyd)
The Loss of a Pet: A Guide to Coping with the Grieving Process When a Pet Dies (Fourth Edition). (Wallace Sife)
Indianapolis, Indiana: Noel Studio, 1996.
Laurel Hunt
Pasadena, California: Darrowby Press, 1998.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Laurel E. Hunt (Editor)
New York: Hyperion, 2000.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Veterinary Practice Publishing Co., Santa Barbara, California, 1994.
Out of print. Not available.
Rita M. Reynolds.
NewSage Press, August 2000.
Jack Canfield (Editor), et al.
Health Communications, Deerfield Beach, Florida, 1998.
Robert S. Pasick.
Chicago: Transitions Bookplace, 2000.
Moira Anderson.
Alpine Publications Inc., Loveland, CO, 1996.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Christina M. Lemieux.
Reading, Pennsylvania, Wallace R. Clark Publishers, 1988.
Julie Kaufman, D.C., C.A.C.
Xenophon Publications, Cottage Grove, Wisconsin, 1999.
J. Potter, Jr. and George Koss.
Guideline Publications, Stamford, New York, 1991.
Howard Bronson.
Sandwich, Massachusetts: Bestsell Publications, 2000.
George and Emily Watson.
PMD Publishing, Salt Lake City, Utah, 2000.
Marsha Olson.
Fairview Press, May 2003.
Cheryl Reneé Webb.
Ortonville, Michigan: BriteBooks, 2002.
Marty Tousley & Katherine Heuerman.
Our Pals Publishing Co., Phoenix, Arizona, 1997. Out of print. Limited availability.
Joan Coleman.
J.C. Tara Enterprises, Inc., Las Vegas, Nevada, 1993.
Cheryl A. Matschek.
Albuquerque, New Mexico: Princess Pub, 1998.
Cheryl Underhill, M. Ed., LPC.
Geadon’s Gift Publications, 1997.
John James.
Harper Collins, New York, 1988.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Peggy Haymes, Susan Lautemann.
Winston-Salem, North Carolina: Kalalogos, 2003.
Marty Becker.
New York: Hyperion, 2002.
Kymberly Smith.
Philadelphia: Charles Press Publisher, 1997.
Heal Your Heart. (Audio CD)Karen Adele Litzinger
Heal from Pet Loss, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, 2009.
Kaetheryn Walker.
Healing Arts Press, Rochester, Vermont, 1999.
Robin Jean Brown.
Lulu Press, Morrisville, North Carolina, 2005.
Melba Colgrove, et al.
Prelude Press, Los Angeles, 1991.
Maria L. Quintana, et al.
Mariposa Press, Perrysburg, Ohio, 2000.
Journey Through Pet Loss. (audio cassette) Deborah Antinori.
Yoko Spirit Publications, Basking Ridge, New Jersey, 2000.
J. Church.
Tiburon, California, 1987.
Shannon Fujimoto Nakaya.
New World Library, 2005.
Eugene O’Neill.
Henry Holt & Company, Inc., 1999 (reprint).
Teresa L. Wagner, Maxine Musgrave.
1998.
Bob Deits.
Fisher Books, Tucson, Arizona, 1992.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Mickie Gustafson.
Bergh Publishing, New York, 1991.
The Loss of a Pet: A Guide to Coping with the Grieving Process When a Pet Dies (Fourth Edition) Wallace Sife, Ph.D.
New York: Howell Book House, 2014.Readers of this book were the founding members of the APLB. It is now being used as the basis for all our counselor training. Please ask for this newly revised and expanded Fourth Edition.
Michael Stern and Susan Cropper.
Jason Aronson Inc., Northvale, New Jersey, 1998.
Martin Kosins.
Open Sky Books, Royal Oaks, Michigan, 1992.
Caroline Knapp.
Broadway Books, New York, 1999.
James L. McClinton, Ph.D.
Lincoln, Nebraska: iUniverse, Inc., 2004
Herbert Nieberg, Ph.D.
Harper & Row, New York, 1982, 1996.
Cheri Barton Ross.
New York: Brunner-Routledge, 2005.
Kay, Nieberg, et al.
Iowa State University Press, 1984.
Cheri Barton Ross, et al.
Brunner-Routledge, 2007.
Laynee Gilbert.
L.O.A. Publications, 2007.
Preparing for the Loss of Your Pet: Saying Goodbye with Love, Dignity, and Peace of Mind. Myrna M. Milani.
Prima Publishing, Rocklin, California, 1998.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Saying Good-Bye to the Pet You Love: A Complete Resource to Help You Heal. Lorri Greene and Jacquelyn Landis.
Shelby’s Grace: From Abused Pup to Angel of Mercy [Kindle Edition] Joe Dwyer.
Perennial Press Publishing LLC, 2010
Susan Kelleher, Rod Lawrence.
Silverthrone, Colorado: Owl of Athene Press, 1998.
Linda Peterson, editor.
Greentree Publishing, West Chester, Pennsylvania, 1997.
David Congalton.
NewSage Press, Troutdale, Oregon, 2000.
Fred Rogers.
New York: Putnam Publishing Group, 1998.
John W. James, Russell Friedman.
London: Perennial, 2002.
When Only the Love Remains: The Pain of Pet Loss. Emily Stuparyk.
Winnipeg, Canada: Stuparyk Publishing, 1998
Joel Gavriele-Gold, Ph.D.
Hoboken, New Jersey: Howell Book House, 2000
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Christine Adamec.
The Berkley Publishing Group, New York, 1996.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Jamie Quackenbush & Denise Graveline.
New York: Simon & Schuster, 1985.
Mary Buddemeyer-Porter.
Manchester, Missouri: Eden Publications, 1995
Pyschology of Loss
William Piper, et al
New York, The Guildford Press, 1992.
Barnell & Barnell
New York, Hamm Sciences Press, 1989.
Elizabeth Kubler-Ross.
Englewood Cliffs, NJ, Simon & Schuster, 1986.
J.W. Worden
New York, Springer Publishing Company, 1991.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Harriet Sarnoff Schiff
New York, Viking Penguin, 1986.
Out of print. Limited availability.
David Dietrich, et al
International Universities Press, Inc. 1989.
Kristin Madden
St. Paul, Minnesota: Llewellyn Publications, 1999
J. Tatelbaum.
New York: Harper & Row, 1989.
Reading for Children
The Tenth Good Thing About Barney (Judith Viorst)
When a Pet Dies (Fred Rogers)
Saying Goodbye to Lulu (Corinne Demas)
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Animal Elders: Caring About Our Aging Animal Companions Diane Pomerance, Ph.D.; Illustrated by Trey Wright
Polaire Publications, 2005
Debby Moorhead
Broomfield, CO, Partners in Publishing, 1996.
Earl Grollman
Beacon Press, 1995
William VanderWyden,
Tabor, 1991.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Marty Tousley
Scottsdale, Arizona, Companion Animal Association of Arizona, 1996.
Roberta Beckmann
Holmes Beach, FL, Learning Publications, Inc., 1990.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Leo Buscaglia
New York: Holt, Rinehart & Winston, 2002.
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Finding Peace After the Loss of a Loved Animal Companion Diane Pomerance, Ph.D.; Illustrated by Trey Wright
Polaire Publications, 2006
Kimberly A. Cardeccia
Bree’s Gift Publishing, Howell, MI, 2004.
Doris Sanford
Multnomah Press, 1986. December 14, 1997
Out of print. Limited availability.
Francine Patterson
Dr. Scholastic, Inc. Reading Rainbow, 1985.
Out of print. Limited availability.
Brian Mellonie & Robert Ingpen
New York, Bantam Books, Inc, 1983.
Munro Leaf
New York, Scholastic Book Services, 1971.
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Warren Hanson
Tristan Publishing, 2008.
Joan Hewett
Lothopp, 1987.
Janus Moncur
Mon Coeur Publishing, LLC; 2007 Edition
Linda Makkay (Author), Marlene Hingstman (Illustrator).
Beaver’s Pond Press (August 29, 2007)
Death of a Pet Brochure death-of-a-pet
Gentle Paws, for the Animal Lover 